Nettles Rant

Today was the day I had been waiting for.  I got to BURN!  I must be a pyromaniac at heart, because burning the pasture and the ditches off in the spring is probably one of my favorite spring-time jobs.  I got everything to the east of our lane done today. Hopefully the wind will not be blowing and I can do the west side tomorrow.

By some ironic twist of fate, on the day I got to do my favorite job, I also had to do the one I do my best to avoid.  I really try to be as organic as possible.  I work hard at it.  I compost, I mulch, I use natural pest deterrents, etc.  I hate, hate, hate to use chemicals, but especially an herbicide. Well, today I broke out the Round-UP.  Not only did I use it, I went through 2 gallons of the stuff.  *sigh*

We have two very nice creeks that run through our property.  It is nice and shady and moist all along our western boundary.  Ideal accommodations for the bane of my existence, stinging nettles.  Apparently conditions were even better than ideal this spring.  It was coming up EVERYWHERE.  Honestly, I have never dealt with a more infuriating, invasive weed before in my life.   

I leave the natural areas of the property alone for the most part.  Plenty of nettles elsewhere for the caterpillars and bobwhites. But I already have to dig them out of the garden without having my efforts further thwarted by their creeping rhizomes that can spread an amazingly long distance underground. So… if they come within a 50 foot radius of my vegetables and berries, I break out the big guns.

Nettles have a vendetta against more pleasant and attractive plants and do their best to over-take and choke the life out of them.  The root system on nettles is amazing and the teeniest bit of rhizome left in (or even on) the ground will re-root and grow a six-foot tall stand of the noxious things, practically overnight. They aren’ t even pretty.

Plus, they give me a lasting-nasty-red-rash-that-itches-like-hell.  

Don’t begin to TRY to tell me they are edible and how amazingly nutritious they are!  And, yes, I do know that nettles are considered a delicacy in Sweden.  Yeah, an extract of the roots is terrific for treating prostrate problems….. I. don’t. care.  I am the only “greens” eater in the family and we are so over-run, I couldn’t eat enough of the darn things to keep them under control if that was all I ever ate for the rest of my life.  Besides, I can’t eat them.  They are covered with poison now, and I am not sorry.

I may consider myself “organic”, but Round-UP is my friend.

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